My Word for the Day " Stop Focussing on what you don't have cause you'll miss what you've already got! "..........
Boy, did I need a good kick in the pants, and I received it yesterday via a kids movie! There is definately a conspiracy out there to get into big peoples heads. Yes, I cried and spent a good amount of time trying to swallow the persistent lump in my throat, who'd have thought that an animation would leave me pondering my present state of being, where I'm at, where I've been and where I'm headed! Movie title... ironically " UP ". My apologies to those who are yet to see it, but I just have to share.
Brief overview......Nerdy but very cute boy meets girl of the same, childhood sweethearts sharing the same dreams and passion for adventure fall in love, marry, save for their ultimate goal, to visit a faraway land filled with mystery and intrigue, children yes but unfortunately no, still saving for the dream, years roll by life gets in the way, still saving he finally buys the tickets....she passes away ( you could have heard a pin drop ).The lump in my throat grew to mammoth proportions at this point. Very cute kid enters his life, he decides to follow the dream, kid gets caught up in the adventure, kid becomes the focus of the journey, but he still has his eyes set on the past and what he didn't achieve almost missing the new adventure awaiting him. He realises that his past was full and rich and wonderful and now it was time for a new chapter and what an amazing chapter it turned out to be.
Oh my gosh, being the dreamer of big dreams that I am, and up to my elbows in the season of teenage girls, the 40's my lifes half over crisis ( I know, the glass is half full,need an attitude adjustment ), time for a new direction, time to follow my passions and dreams ( once I can identify them with some clarity )struggling with who I am now that my girls are more independent,what is my purpose ( knowing full well that being a mum is a privilege and a purpose )trying to come to terms with my failures and letting them go, I could prattle on but I think I'll stop there, I'm sounding totally disfunctional.
Reality check ! I'm missing what I've already got and if I blink I'm going to miss it totally.
It only seems like yesterday that I held my beautiful first born in my arms, captivated by her, wondering what the future held, that was 4 children and 18 years ago! I've been so focussed on what I haven't achieved and what I want to achieve that it is obscuring the blessings of what I am experiencing now. Just the other day, my hubby and I were able to spend a day out on the lake fishing, just the two of us, courtesy of the now season (teenage girls social calenders simultaneously full ). It's a little bit like reading a book, being impatient after reading the first chapter and skipping through to the last missing what's in the middle and then having to constantly flick back trying to fill in the gaps.The best bits are always inbetween the beginning and the end.
There is nothing wrong with dreaming, God gives us desires and passions but life is not about what I haven't achieved, it's about appreciating what I have, living in and enjoying the present, being grateful and content and trusting that He knows the desires of my heart and will bring them to pass.
This Sista has just learnt a lesson. Lxx